[open] dont you forget about me

[Blake Emma Renner]

The annoying beeping sound coming from her monitors helped fill the silence that spread between them. There was a different reason why he was with her, one she wasn’t sure she was ready to hear yet. Blake brought her hand up to her face tiredly, running it over her eyes. There was so much that was happening, so quickly. At the end of it all, she just felt exhausted. Which wasn’t fair, since she had been sleeping this entire time apparently. She brought her eyes back to him, glancing over him. ” It looks like you haven’t eaten. Or slept.” she noted, biting the inside of her cheek. “ Is there…. Is there anything you’re wanting to ask me?” she questioned. Maybe there wasn’t a lot she could answer right now, but she had to keep reminding herself that she isn’t the only person in this room who had lost the last five years of her life. He’d lost their life together, too.

[Logan Chase Renner]

Logan looked down at his hands in the silence; awkward, again. Maybe this was how it was going to be from now on, a balancing act between awkwardness and trying to have friendly chit chat. There was so much she didn't know about her own life, and Logan was a consistent presence at the center of it all along. What would she think of him when she knew the truth about them? She mentioned that he looked tired, hungry. He shook his head slightly, "I'm alright." Lies. His most common lie, in fact. Logan was an honest man but he was never honest about his own state of being. He couldn't let on to people his exhaustion, he was responsible for a lot of things. He was the face of a company. As far as people knew, Logan Renner didn't exhaust himself; he was inexhaustible. But Blake knew that wasn't true when he stared into is mashed potatoes in the evenings, or clung to his cup of coffee ever morning like it was the elixir of life itself. This Blake didn't know that though. She asked if he had questions, but the only questions he had were ones she had no answers to. Do you think you'll ever remember us? Will things be normal again ever? Do you think you could love me again? He motioned to the wedding ring she had taken off, frowning, "Can I hold onto that for you?" He knew she wasn't going to wear it, but for some reason the thought of it just sitting in a jewelry box made him sad. He just wanted to keep it with him, something he could hold onto until she was ready to wear it again.

[Blake Emma Renner]

Blake narrowed her eyes at him slightly as he said that he was fine. She’d watched him for years. She knew his expressions when he was and wasn’t fine, when he was hiding something from Scarlet or his father. She knew. “Hm,” she hummed quietly to herself, wondering how much convincing it would take for her mother to take him something to eat, perhaps a pot roast with steamed carrots and potatoes. And milk , milk would balance it out. Surely it wouldn’t take too much convincing, it was her daughter’s husband. Blake held her breath at that thought, before looking back at Logan who had decided on a question for her. Hold onto the ring? Her eyes moved from him back to the ring on the fabric. “Oh,” she said quietly, picking it up before bringing it up to look at. “ It is beautiful,” she said, pondering her options. Blake looked at him, trying to not let the heat from her cheeks that were blushing again stop her from talking. “I think….no…” she said quietly, looking at him like he was a deer who may scurry away. “But I … if you could bring, if I had um.. like a necklace at…” she said, taking in a breath as she watched him. Our place? Your place?... “..the…house.. I would like to put it on a necklace, if that’s alright.” she said, pulling herself away from his gaze again. She felt the ring in her fingertips, turning it over. The first time she had seen it, had she known he was going to propose? Girls always say they know, that the guys are acting weird. But had she expected it? Did she cry? Cause she kind of felt like she was going to cry now. Wait. No. She was. “I’m sorry,” she said, scrunching her nose up before she brought her hands up over her face to hide herself.

[Logan Chase Renner]

Logan was surprised when she told him no and wanted to keep her ring. It was sort of comforting to know she was trying, gave him some hope. "Ummm, yeah, of course." Sure, Blake had plenty of necklaces and things. He could bring her something back. It gave him something to do once he realized he couldn't sit here forever because he could only embarrass her so much. It was like her face was a permanent shade of pink. And actually he felt... not good about it. Just being around him made her uncomfortable. Seeing her crying brought a pain to the pit of his stomach. Did he do that? He was too much right now. Maybe he should go and let her be by herself for a little while. "No, that's... you don't have to..." he sighed. She couldn't help what she was feeling, this was going to be hard on every one. "Maybe... you want to be alone for a little while...? Are you hungry or anything..." He knew he wasn't exactly who she needed right now but he couldn't just flip the switch on being her husband. he couldn't turn off wanting to take care of her.

[Blake Emma Renner]

Blake tried to stop the tears that we're starting to fall down her cheeks by repeatedly swiping them away. It just felt insane that Logan Renner was sitting at her bedside, trying to find ways to take care of her like it was something that was normal to him. It definitely wasn't normal to her. And they had a family together? A life that he loved? She let out a deep breath after he asked if she was hungry. She hasn't thought about it but she imagined that she was. Plus he had asked if she wanted to be alone; didn't that imply that he would come back? Blake tensed for a moment, realizing that she hadn't actually thought about what this meant. Was the marriage over? Clearly not, she asked to hold onto the ring. But it didn't mean that things were normal either. So where did they start off? Did she live with him, date him, be friends? " I actually am really hungry. And tired." she said before realizing how selfish that was to say to him of all people. " I'm scared," she admitted, bringing her gaze back to him. " I don't know what happened to us before, or what path we took that somehow went in the same direction, but you didn't sign up for this. And I don't know how we make this normal or right. What if nothing ever goes back to the way it " should be". It's so much pressure. And I already can't talk to you. I don't know how I did before." she said, swallowing hard at the tears that were forming. What if she woke up to the best situation in the world, only to turn it into a nightmare by losing his love?

[Logan Chase Renner]

Logan sighed, knowing his time was nearly up. But it was okay, they'd have lots of time for the rest of forever hopefully, to rebuild something that was meant to be. And he WAS hungry so maybe he could go grab them some real food, something she really liked, from one of her favorite places. If she liked it before she'd still like it now. He heard her say she was scared. "That's okay." It was okay to be scared, he was too. But thinking of his fears right now would keep him from counting his blessings. How could he worry that his wife might not fall in love with him again when the joy that she was awake and mostly healthy was more than he could have asked for. He was truly blessed. But something she said struck him, an he furrowed his eyebrows, looking at her, "I did actually, sign up for this. This IS what I signed up for, Blake." He stood up and walked over to her bed, taking her hand gently, "I made a promise to you that I'd be here for everything, good and bad. You might not remember, but I gave you my word. I'm not sure there's a "should be" in this situation. We'll find our way again. We always do." He nodded with finality and let go of her hand, "there's a restaurant around the corner that we like to go to, I'll go grab us some real food and be back?" That gave her some time to be alone with her thoughts, but he wanted her to know he was with her because he wanted, no, needed to be. She made him whole and without her, he was only just a shell of the Logan he wanted to be. She would figure that out though.

[Blake Emma Renner]

Blake held her breath as Logan moved toward her, holding his hand gently over hers. It felt like a faint tingle where his skin rest against hers. She took in a deep breath, looking up at him as he spoke. The vows that he was talking about, ones that you heard in sitcoms and television shows, random weddings you had to attend as a kid, always talked about for better or worse. But this felt like the worst possible disaster that Logan could have possibly dreamed off if he really did love her. But he said that they would find their way, because they always did. She wondered what type of troubles they had come across before in the last five years. Blake looked at him, trying to think of something, anything, that she could say, but just found herself staring at him with her mouth slightly open. What was there that she could say? “ Um… Nothing with fake cheese..” she said quietly, before narrowing her eyebrows at herself. That was a weird thing to say. “ I mean thank you,” she amended, closing her eyes with a shake of her head. “ Actually… yeah..” she said, shaking her head again. So much shaking of her head. “ Thank you.. for.. the nurse said you’ve been in this room for as much time as I have.” she uttered quietly, biting the edge of her lip. “ I think I’m just going to close my eyes while you’re gone,” she said, letting them close tiredly. “ If you’re a dream, I don’t want to wake up anyway,”