[Kind of Open?] Beside You

[Kenzie Renner]

Kenzie smiled at the little girl next to her, offering her another package of pretzels. If she had to guess, she would say that she was maybe five or six years old. Her laughter was infectious, pure, and innocent. Kenzie tried to remember the last time she had laughed so genuinely, and of course.. it was with Brayden. A small nervous flutter rose through her stomach as she realized what she was actually going to do. This was it. No dancing around the subject. No sneakily trying to ask him how he felt about her. She had walked out on a wedding. The moment Shane had played some of the music for her out on the balcony, she’d kissed him on the cheek and left, suddenly feeling nauseous. That nausea turned into resolution, when as she spoke to Emma it became perfectly clear that her only choice was to go after Brayden, once and for all. And here she was on her wedding day, starting the rest of her life. It just wasn’t with the man she had been planning on for the last several months. But be real, Brayden had been the one since he’d been born and she had decided that it was her responsibility to teach him everything she knew about this world. In reality, he took so much more care of her as they grew.

The plane jolted, just slightly, causing the little girls eyes to grow with worry. Her mom was in the bathroom, and Kenzie looked over her shoulder to see if she was coming back yet. There was no sign of her. “ Hey,” Kenzie said, smiling at the little girl. Upon really looking at her, she looked a lot like Emma. Her eyes were filled with wonder and amazement. Kenzie could tell that she was similar to Emma in the sense that she just soaked up everything, and absorbed the environment around her like a sponge. “Everything is fine. Plane’s do that all the time,” she said, giving her a wink before patting her on the arm. Yet, it was the next drop that put some worry in Kenzie. She threw her arm over in front of the girl next to her out of instinct, placing her other hand on her chest. The oxygen masks dropped from above just as the girls mother came back to the aisle, rushing to help her daughter. Kenzie looked around, realizing that people were starting to become frantic. The flight attendants were moving quickly down the aisles.

The pilots voice came over the speakers, announcing that they were going to have to make an emergency landing. But where? Kenzie lunged toward the window, placing her fingers against the glass as they curled up, realizing that the only thing for miles was water. Panic rose in her chest as she forced herself to take a breath. There were people around her, praying on their knees, clutching onto their loved ones, voices were screaming out, asking God to do what he could to save them. “Oh my God,” was the only thing that Kenzie could muster up to say for herself, even though it came out quiet, almost too quietly. “Wake up,” she said to herself, closing her eyes slightly. This had to be a nightmare. And suddenly the nose of the plane went down drastically to the point where Kenzie was left clutching onto the chair so that she didn’t fly forward. She looked up at her knuckles, turning white from the tight grip that she was clinging onto the seat from, her weight pulling against her. And with a sudden movement, her hands loosened from the chair, causing a horrendous scream to escape her lips as she fell further down the aisle of the plane.



“There is still brain activity. I understand your concerns of whether or not your daughter will retain her memories. At this moment I can’t say with certainty what will happen when she does wake up, but it isn’t something we have concerns with at a moment. The progress so far is good.. Improvements are good. The rest of her health is getting more and more stable each day. Logan,…Blake… these are really good improvements,”. Whose voice was that? It was an Australian accent, but it was too thick to be Brayden’s. She tried opening her eyes yet found herself unable. There was a faint beeping in the background, and the sniffles.. those sniffles were undeniable. Emma was here. She tried to move her fingers, to reach out to her. But nothing. She felt trapped. Just moments ago it felt like she had been twirling through the wind, and now she was trapped, no longer free-falling, but a prisoner to her own body. How long had it been since she was in a plane?

It felt like days later, after she had heard the thick Australian accent. There was a hand on hers. She felt the calloused fingertips and her heart felt like it was about to catapult out of her chest. Brayden. A machine started going off, beeping quicker and quicker. “It’s fine,” a more soothing Australian accent said, it sounded very feminine. “It’s just her heartrate… I think she knows you’re here, Brayden,”. It must have been a nurse. Because at this point, Kenzie was able to deduct that she was in the hospital. Had her heart been racing each time Brayden touched her or she heard his voice? Because clearly he had some sort of impact on her. “I bet she’s hearing everything you say to her,” the voice said again, before Kenzie heard what sounded like her patting him on the back before a door opened and shut.

There was a stillness in the room this morning. There weren’t a lot of alarms on the machines, the hospital staff wasn’t coming in and out.

In fact, it seemed like the visitors were staying in shorter periods of time. Perhaps, they were finally starting to take care of themselves; get sleep, something to eat. Whoever was in her room right now was being extremely quiet, maybe they’d fallen asleep themselves. But she figured she would try, maybe one more time. She tried every time she felt aware of her surroundings. Kenzie willed everything inside of her to move her fingers. Maybe she imagined it, or maybe it happened, but it felt like her finger scrapped against the sheets beneath her. They were soft; no doubt that one of the women in her family had insisted on switching to softer sheets than what the hospital provided. It went from being one finger, to all of her fingers. She moved her fingers.

With the excitement of movement, the heart monitor began to chime off. She was so excited about moving, that of course her heart rate had increased, alerting the monitors. It was like her body had spent all of this time asleep, and was finally allowing itself to wake up. With a bolt, her eyes flashed open and she immediately felt like she was choking on the breathing tube inserted down her throat. Kenzie tried to reach up, but found that she was still weak, as she began to cough and fight against the tubing.

[Brayden Shane Madden]

They say you don't know what you're missing until you lose it, but Brayden knew exactly what he had been missing all along, and then to nearly lose it, without even having it, was probably worse?  It felt worse, though he was sure superman would disagree.  When Emma had texted him and cryptically told him not to make plans, he'd realized pretty quickly that Kenzie must have hopped on a plane.  Emma wasn't that great at secrets that involved getting her sister and Brayden back together.  The entire way to the airport Brayden had tried to figure what he was going to say to her.  He should tell her how he really felt.  He should tell her he was sorry they had lost touch.  He should tell her he still loved her.  He knew what day it was, the date had been unfortunately seared into his brain,  so there was no questioning why she was flying to Australia and not getting ready to be married; she must have needed to see him.  And if she was ditching her own wedding then he had no reservations about telling her how he really felt.  

But when he had arrived at the airport, people were in a frenzy.  There was talk of a plane going down and Brayden tried to pick up from conversations where it had been coming from.  The news was on some TV talking about it.  Emma had told him what time Kenzie's flight was supposed to be in, and the fact that it was late was making him worried.  A few questions and texts later confirmed his worries.  Brayden had been in such shock that he had actually just sat down at the airport, unable to decide what he should be doing.  He was sure Renner's had by now been told by Emma what flight she was on.  Shane had called Brayden to tell him even though Brayden sort of figured it out.  He was sitting in the airport thinking about everyone flying to Australia and that would be hours from now.  He was just sitting there.  No one had told anyone anything about survivors.  He didn't even know if Kenzie was alive.  The thought itself was so foreign and strange he couldn't seem to process anything.  And so he sat there.  For a long time, watching people pass by, listening to conversations, watching the news.  3 survivors.  No names had obviously been released before contacting the families.  Eventually Brayden's phone rang, seeing it was Daniel's number.  Brayden didn't answer it.  He needed to hear from his dad, or Logan.  Daniel called again.  Reluctantly Brayden picked it up, wondering if Daniel knew something more.  "Hello?"  "Where the fuck is my fiance?"  "What?"  "You heard me, where is she, what did you two do?"  "I don't... I'm sorry, I'm con-" "Don't give me that bullshit, Brayden.  Do you have any idea how embarrassing this is for me?"  Brayden didn't respond.  Daniel didn't know.  "No response now, huh?  I'm right then, she left, to see you."  "She was on a plane..." Brayden struggled, saying it out loud for the first time, the words feeling awkward leaving his mouth.  "You've got to be fucking kidding me..." Daniel went on, lecturing Brayden about stealing people's fiances, and being prideful.  "Haven't you seen the news?" Brayden asked as he stared off at a nearby TV.  Of course Daniel hadn't seen the news, he was trying to find his runaway bride.

Some time later Logan called and Brayden answered it, scared shitless of what was coming.  At least this phone call gave him something to focus on.  She was alive, she was being taken to a hospital.  Going to the hospital was something Brayden could handle.  Of course when he arrived it wasn't as if they would tell him anything since he wasn't immediate family, but he was in the same place as Kenzie and that was going to have to do for now.  Hours later the Renner's arrived, and his own family.  He hugged people robotically.  "Just find out how she's doing," was all he had to say.  

At least over the course of a few days her health had been dramatically improving and her brain activity was high for someone unable to wake up.  With the knowledge that she was most likely going to pull through and it was just a matter of waiting, everyone had slightly relaxed.  They took turns sitting with Kenzie.  A few times Brayden had sat with her for a while alone, giving her family some time to eat together, get some fresh air.  He'd panicked the first time her heart rate increased suddenly, but the nurse said that it was normal, a good sign she was in there trying to wake up.  She said Kenzie must have known he was there.  Christmas barely felt like a holiday.  Brayden felt he didn't want to ring in the New Year with out her.  He was with her at midnight, talking to her, telling her all the things he didn't say to her before when he should have.  Like how much he adored her, and always had.  How relieved he was that she wasn't married to Daniel.  How happy it made him to know she had gotten on a plane and ditched her own wedding for him.  How much he loved her.  How he hoped they could walk away from this with a fresh start, and just maybe she and him could have a life together, if that was what she wanted too.  She was still his New Year's kiss, like every other year.  That got her heart rate going.  He felt like she knew it was him.  Maybe she really could hear him.

On the day she woke up Emma was sitting near the window, reading.  Brayden sat beside Kenzie and took her hand.  He always got nervous when her heart monitor picked up but her nurse reassured them it was okay.  Maybe she had the right idea, maybe they should just both take long naps.  Holding her hand loosely, he rested his head on the bed and closed his eyes, thinking he could fall asleep and maybe join her in her dreams.  He thought he felt her finger move but he knew that was just wishful thinking.  The second time when all her fingers jolted he sat up, watching her eyes roll behind her eyelids.  "Emma..." he said tentatively, the heart monitoring going faster and then her eyes opened suddenly.  Obviously waking up to a breathing tube down your throat was probably unpleasant.  "Oh my god," Emma sat, jumping up before leaving quickly, "I'll get the nurse."  Brayden stayed with Kenzie, still holding her hand and took her other hand away from the tube, "Hey, Emma's here, she's gonna get a nurse, just hang tight for another minute." Not that he thought he would be able to if it were him, but at least she knew she wasn't alone.    

[Kenzie Renner]

It was probably only a few moments, but it felt like a lifetime. Amidst the chaos she could tell that Emma had gone off to get someone. And Brayden…. Oh, Brayden. He was holding her hand away from the tube that felt like it was choking the life out of her, instead of giving her breath. People came in a frenzy, multiple people, sort of pushing Brayden out of her eyesight, which did not do much for calming her nerves. Within seconds they had taken it out of her, and almost immediately she took in a big gasp of air. Mistake. The air hitting her lungs stung, and the pain radiated through her chest. She sat there motionless, sort of shocked at the pain that went over her. “Let the air out, Kenzie,” one of the nurses said, trying to sound soothing. She waited a moment, still trying to gather her senses before she pushed the air out of her lungs quickly and tried to calm her nerves. She tried to look past the nurse to see Brayden, see Emma. But they were putting a flashlight in her eyes, asking her to say her name, checking her reflexes.

Eventually they made their way out, and Kenzie barely had time to bring her hand to her throat before Emma was at her, hugging her body against herself. Kenzie brought her hand up to Emma’s back, wincing slightly. “God, Emma,” she said quietly with a strained rasp to her voice, “You’re so dramatic,” she said, alluding to the fact that Emma was crying as she hugged her. There was a soft giggle, which honestly sounded like heaven to Kenzie. She closed her eyes, tightening what little strength she had in her fingertips on Emma’s back. She smelled like vanilla. She always smelled like vanilla, whether it was from baking with their mom, or from the lotions that she always seemed to have on her. And right now, it was Kenzie’s favorite smell in the world. But after a little bit, Emma seemed to compose herself. “Oh my gosh, mom and dad. The nurses don’t know that they went to catch some sleep… I’m going to call them,” she said, pushing her delicate fingers against her cheeks to brush the tears away. Kenzie nodded tiredly, reluctantly letting go of her sisters hand as she left the room.

Kenzie looked over at Brayden, who had politely let her and Emma have a moment with one another. She opened her mouth to say something, but found that she didn’t actually know what to say. She’d left her wedding for him. He’d stayed here for days, telling her how he felt. Though she noticed that her throat hurt, she was starting to become vaguely aware that a lot of other things hurt, too. Her sides, was it her ribs? She had stitches on her arm. A reasonable person might want to know what was wrong with them, pick Brayden’s mind to figure out what had happened. But.. she’d heard everything. She knew she had been in a plane crash. She’d heard the little girl come talk to her family. She knew that she would need some physical therapy, but at the end of the day, that she was going to be okay. But as she looked at Brayden, didn’t she know that anyway? She was going to be okay. “So,” she said, giving a flicker of a smile as she ignored the pain in her throat. “ You sort of have a thing for me, huh?” she teased, coughing slightly as she cleared her throat.

[Brayden Shane Madden]

Brayden was reluctant to let anyone get between himself and Kenzie but they were checking her out and getting the tube out of her throat so it was probably good that he be out of the way.  Even though being across the room felt like a million miles.  People were leaving, going to do whatever it was they did at hospitals and Emma was crying which shocked no one.  Brayden didn't blame her though, he felt more relieved to hear Kenzie tease her little sister than he had in his entire life.  Emma left to go call their parents and tell them she had woken up, and Brayden knew she was affording them a moment alone.  Brayden moved back to her bedside, smiling hugely as she looked at him and made a comment about him having a thing for her.  He jokingly shrugged and played it off as he sat down beside her, "Oh you know, maybe just a tiny bit.  Nothing too major."  He took her hand, bringing it up to his lips and kissed it, "It's good to hear your voice."

[Kenzie Renner]

After Emma had gone off to alert her parents, she was mildly aware of how thankful she was that her parents were there. As much as she tried to play it cool, the people closest to her knew how much of a front that was. An icy cold exterior was nothing to how she really felt. She looked back at Brayden, finding herself smiling again as he joked about whether or not he had a thing for her. She could feel her heart flutter as he picked her hand up, placing a kiss against it. Some machine was going off, causing her to look away from him to see what it was. Her heart was racing. She narrowed her eyebrows slightly before smiling at Brayden. Well it was hard to have a poker face when there were devices connected to you. " It's good to see you," she said quietly. She'd heard his voice for the last several days, not being able to reach out and touch him, that was the part that was the hardest for her. Kenzie took her hand away from him just for a moment, pushing it down against the bed as she tried to use her energy to push herself up and to the side. "Come here," she said, patting the side of the bed next to her. It seemed like someone else was trying to come in and check on her, but she heard a southern twang. "She's fine, give em a minute." Wes. She smiled slightly, knowing how protective Wes was probably being over Emma the entire time there. " Now ma'am, I said that you need to hold on a minute. And I'd be might appreciative if you did just that." she heard the voice say again before silence followed outside the room. Kenzie waited a moment before she looked back at Brayden. She scrunched her nose, trying to figure out how to move her IV so that when he laid down it wouldn't pull on it or bunch it up. " I think you have to move the machine," she said, taking a second look at the IV on her arm to see if there was any way that she could just take the damn thing out. She dropped it tiredly, laying on her side so that she could face him. It was strange really, having someone in your life that you could talk to about anything. Brayden was that person for her, she could literally talk to him until the end of time. But it was also strange, how that same person.. could say a million things to you when they weren't saying anything at all.

[Brayden Shane Madden]

Brayden heard Wes in the hall acting like a protective guard dog over this moment and Brayden was grateful for that.  He knew everyone wanted to see her but he selfishly wanted her all to himself.  "Challenge accepted," he said, analyzing the things around her bed and tried rearranging them before finally sitting back down and laid back next to her. He took her hand back in his, something not unusual between them but somehow the sight of it made his heart flutter.  There wasn't much else to say.  He knew how she felt, she'd ran away from her wedding to be with Brayden.  And he'd all but confessed his undying love for her; none of which went unheard.  He leaned over and kissed her forehead, "My dad told me you heard some of the new music," he mentioned, kissing her nose, "Shit if I thought you were gonna hop a plane I would have given you a private show," he mused, smiling before he leaned over to kiss her lips, lingering for a moment before moving his hand to her jaw and deepened the kiss.  I miss you.  I love you.  I need you.  All of the above.  

[Kenzie Renner]

Kenzie rest against the pillow, trying to memorize Brayden's features all over again. I mean sure, she could describe him down to the last freckle, but after knowing how someone felt about you, you just began to notice little things.She closed her eyes as he leaned over to kiss his forehead, relishing the moment. Yes, she had heard the music. And it was amazing, though everything Brayden did had always felt like it was amazing to her. But in true Madden style, he was making a little joke. But that was the scary part of it. She hadn't known she was going to hop on a plane. If she hadn't spoken with Shane at the rehearsal dinner, she could be Lois Lane-ing it up right now. She would need to make Shane a pastry basket later. " I could still take a private sh-" she started, but found herself caught off guard as he kissed her lips. It wasn't the first time they had kissed. I mean, she made him kiss her every time they left each other ever since they were kids. It's how they had to settle little arguments as toddlers, into their teen years. She'd get drunk, brave.. he was so handsome. His lips were not unfamiliar too her. She had always known how she felt about him, but now they were on the same page. So as he kissed her, as he really kissed her, it took her breath away, Kenzie brought her hand up to hold the outside of his wrist, ignoring the monitor that was going off quickly. Kenzie moved as close to him as she possibly could, and considering how hospital beds aren't known for their luxurious width, most of the work was already done for her. She moved her hand so that she could place her fingers against the soft skin on the side of his neck. Without surprise, the door burst open. "Ke- oh..." the nurse said, taking a slight step back. " Hot dog!" Wes said with a hearty laugh in his throat. After they shut the door behind them, explaining to Emma that was Kenzie was preoccupied, but fine. "More than fine," she heard one of the nurses explain. Kenzie closed her eyes, placing her forehead against Brayden's for a moment before taking in a deep breath. She leaned back slightly to look at him again, bringing her fingertips up to the side of his jaw as she traced it lightly, " I have loved you..." she said, offering the faintest of smiles before leaning in to give him another quick kiss.

[Blake Emma Renner]

Blake and Logan had initially planned on going out somewhere to eat, but with each day that Kenzie stayed in the hospital, it was like the paparazzi multiplied. It was just easier to be downstairs in the cafeteria than to go out and face them when Logan and herself didn't have any answers yet. "I'm just suggesting that mashed potatoes would be better if they didn't come from a box." Blake said through a smile plastered on her face. Emma hadn't been taking very good care of herself in regards to eating. That girl loved with her whole heart, and it consumed her. She was there for her sister, and yet it seemed like she had forgotten to be there for herself. But potatoes.. if she could get some potatoes, the girl would eat. She heard her phone ringing, looking down into her purse before she pushed her hair from her face and brought the phone to her ear. Emma, crying. " Sweet pea, slow down. What was that?" she said, before reaching out to squeeze Logan's arm. "Okay, okay!" she said, dropping her phone to her side and looking at Logan. " She's awake." she said excitedly before she turned to head away. But she turned back quickly, grabbing a couple of the pre-made sandwiches that were wrapped up.

The boys would be hungry, Emma needed food, and as much as she hated pre-made food, this was a hospital and she didn't have a lot of choice. Blake bounced on her heels, surprised that Logan had gotten on the elevator with her and not opted to just run up the entire damn flights of stairs to get to his daughter. But she figured that perhaps the shock had just taken over. When the doors opened she ran out, going toward her youngest daughter. " Is she okay? What did she say? Are they with her?" she questioned, holding sandwiches out to Wes, before looking toward Emma. She looked at her daughter, her eyes fresh with tears, but a smile that just couldn't quit. Blake leaned forward, wrapping her arms as tightly as she possibly could around Emma, kissing the side of her hair as she squeezed her in.

[Brayden Shane Madden]

For the time being they have about five minutes of being in this bubble before anyone started showing up.  If it weren't for the heart monitor going crazy they might have gone uninterrupted but now, who's fault was that?  Brayden laughed slightly as the nurse burst in before realizing Kenzie was fine.  Wes could be heard in the background and Brayden thought, you know what? I hope we have a million more moments like this getting caught.  Getting caught by nurses or gardeners, getting caught under the lights or getting caught in the rain.  The nurse left and Brayden was easily sucked back in.  I have loved you... for how long?  My whole life, your whole life, before that? Forever?  "I know, me too."  Brayden smiled, leaving her with one last kiss before Logan Renner threw the door open.  Well someone didn't give a rats ass about private moments.  No nurse was going to hold him back.  "Kenzie..." he said as he moved to his daughter.  Brayden gave her hand a squeeze again, and reluctantly sat up so her parents could hug her.  Logan glanced at Brayden and sighed and he almost looked... relieved?  No, he looked the way someone looks when you finally get something right.  Looks like everyone was feeling that way.  Kenzie's family was going to stick around and they were going to spend time with her, and that was fine, but Brayden wasn't leaving for anything.  So if they thought he was going to get up and move somewhere else they were poorly mistaken.

[Kenzie Renner]

There was an actual picture of the first time that Kenzie met Brayden. He'd been the first thing she had obsessed over. Her entire childhood was flooded with memories of having to have him beside her. She wanted to share everything with him. He'd been the best present she had ever gotten, because hadn't she always believed that he in some sense belonged to her? And now she could finally say that she felt like she belonged to him. There was a wedding. A plane crashed into the ocean. And yet, she felt like their love was stronger than all of that. If she really allowed herself to sit back and think about the crash, she'd realize how traumatized she really felt about it. Except, there as this thing about Brayden that had been true for their whole lives - he brought a peace to her. She was thankful that as Logan came bursting into the door that Brayden didn't move away from her. Beside her, that was his place forever now. "Dad," Kenzie said, doing her best to sit up and wrap her arm without the IV around him tightly. " I was so scared," she said, burying her face into her fathers neck. "I'm so sorry, I had to," she said, realizing that tears were coming to her eyes. She moved back so she could look at him, shaking her head the best she could manage. " I had to, you get that right?". She sniffled, realizing that Blake was basically laying on Brayden so that she could hug Kenzie, too. " Get in here, Emma," Blake said, gesturing for a huge family hug before she shifted so that Brayden could get in on it, too.

Kenzie winced quietly at everyone hugging her, still fully realizing how much pain she was actually in. 'I can't breathe," she said, waiting for everyone to sort of back away from her. She looked in the corner at Wes, who was standing with his hands in his pockets and beaming at Emma. Kenzie couldn't help but laugh quietly at the awkwardness of Wes standing apart from them. "Thank you for taking care of Emma. She's a handful," Kenzie said, finally smiling at her sister. "Am I allowed to eat?" she asked, looking around at them. Swallowing flaming hot cheetos would probably hurt like hell, but she hadn't had real food in how long now? Kenzie looked around at everyone, placing her hand in Brayden's before taking in a deep breath. "I'm just going to go ahead and..address the elephant in the room, I guess," she said, tightening her grip around Brayden's hand. " Guys... I'm... I'm so sorry," she said, turning to look at her family. "It's just.. I couldn't.. I'd... Shane and Emma made me realize that I had the choice to be happy, and I just needed to take it. And I never even imagined anything like .... I am so sorry for what you've been through,"